It took a moment for Bokuto to respond, but after some time, he managed some words. Wincing a bit, Akaashi squinted at his phone screen. He had to force himself to say the mere four words. Akaashi could feel Bokuto's enthusiasm through his text messages. I never asked." If there was one thing that Akaashi had learned about Bokuto in the little time that he'd known him, it was that he wasn't too fond of staying locked up indoors. Akaashi said bitterly as he hobbled up the stairs. what disease did, bokuto have in another life. "May I ask your name?" That had been the fifth time that month where Akaashi had to tear himself out of another nightmare. Akaashi pursed his lips and nodded once. His hands squeezed tightly around the navy blue blanket that enveloped him. I guess I can wait that long. He reached a hand out and found Bokuto's. Akaashi cast a weary look in Bokuto's direction, gave a nod, and continued on his way until he was out of the building. But in the end, I couldn't move. Akaashi yanked his hands away and stared at Bokuto. This one.". He continued to stare on as he talked. "Yeah, but Do You think it will snow soon? He swallowed once, hoping to get rid of the lump in his throat. ", Bokuto couldn't help but guffaw, his head tilting back. "You can sit anywhere." "I know." Is he here?". Three times, Bokuto jolted awake involuntarily, and three times, he covered his eyes with his forearm and heaved a quiet sigh. I've realized that I don't want to come here anymore. In another life. It wasn't long before Akaashi had leaned his head on Kuroo's shoulder, as he, too, fell victim to the sorrow that slowly ate him alive. "The liquid started flooding into my mouth and nose, and it wasn't until I was suffocating that I forced myself awake.". "We're going back to the hospital right now. Bokuto's hallucinations had become such a part of him, that he thought the snow outside was just another mind trick. This is why I never read Major Character Death. The day was exceptionally cold, but Akaashi was glad to know that the hospital's room provided enough heat to keep Bokuto from freezing over. "I guess you can Just as long as you're feeling better. Ones that said, He's not dying. Akaashi scowled. He twisted his fingers and pursed his lips, wary of what Kuroo would say next. It was a surreal feeling, one that he could never in one million years describe. He threw it open and faced Bokuto, who was jogging to him with a smile and a shiver in each step. Akaashi had to wait almost a minute for Bokuto's response. I never said that I was.". Such a task as easy as swallowing was now a problem for Bokuto, too, and after many failed attempts at keeping his food down, or getting it to go down in the first place, the nurses found it would be best if Bokuto received nourishment the only other way possible, and that was through a tube. Akaashi refused to have reacted to those moments, hoping to spare his visitor the embarrassment of him having seen that. Akaashi shifted, leaning in the direction of where he'd come from. It was the last word Kuroo murmured before he stared forward as well, having nothing more to say. His breathing evened out and in no time, he could feel himself slipping, slowly, into the warm grasp of sleep, unable to resist. He stood there, hesitant, uninterested, indifferent. Akaashi was glad. Kuroo rubbed the lower part of his face with his hand. He held his breath, then proceeded to ask again. "He does. His voice was full of excitement as he proceeded to enter the name for his new contact. He looked up, and his gaze found Bokuto's. externally i'm smiling probably because i'm trying to hide all those FEELS. "I know." That was enough for Akaashi to remove his hand from in front his mouth slowly, moving it to rest it over his chin. Akaashi rubbed the back of his neck hastily and closed his eyes. He only accepted my company. He's an okay guy. He swore without a filter. Another shudder threatened to rattle him, but he kept himself still, as difficult as that was. After several seconds, he'd returned to see that Bokuto had changed his position in bed entirely. That was six days ago. If you watched Haikyuu, and anime, I would definitely recommend this ebook. He didn't want to talk to anyone. There was nothing. "I still miss it though. "I didn't Want you to leave. It wasn't like Bokuto to question what he said in such a straightforward fashion. Looking up from the laptop screen, Bokuto directed his attention to Akaashi. "It isn't." He carried a look on his face that made him seem more sinister than sincere, and his eyes flitted from Kenma to Akaashi, and then back to Kenma. what disease did, bokuto have in another life. He didn't care if it was seven at night, or eight at night, or twelve in the morning, or if the world's clock stopped moving altogether. He was shocked. The day was strangely chilly, with an occasional breeze now and then, causing the browning leaves to rustle in the trees above. The disappointment in his voice was clear. My last memory of Bokuto will not be of him sharply dressed, pale, stiff, and stuffed in a casket, surrounded by a countless amount of people who did not care for him at all until the day they heard about his death. He had so many things he'd wanted to do with him, so many things he'd wanted to say, but all of those things seemed to have fallen away once the moment had finally come. Kenma almost murmured the words. "There's something about Bokuto that doesn't sit well with me. "What?" Hesitant fingers that ghosted over Akaashi's forehead in order to push a loose strand of hair away. Bokuto stared down at the white clump of melting ice, and with one finger, he pressed against it to watch it fall apart. He ascended those familiar steps, said hello to the familiar faces, and rounded that familiar corner that he knew would lead him to Bokuto's room. They both found it easier to believe in that lie than to accept the truth of what was to come. Sleeping didn't come as easy as it used to. Akaashi took a shot at it. Bokuto talked quietly in response to Kenma, gave a nod, and smiled. "Why did you stop so suddenly? He wouldn't always get answers, Akaashi was aware of this, but he would still ask him things. Especially before certain volleyball matches." "I don't think I want to ask about the symptoms of this illness.". sutton united average attendance; In the span of a little over a month, Bokuto had gone from a general one-hundred and fifty pounds to a mere ninety-seven pounds, last time they'd weighed him. Bokuto refused to budge. Akaashi took an unnoticeable step back. He only bundled himself up in the sheets that surrounded him. "Awful." I was just thinking." "I'm going straight to sleep.". hasjhjaa currently crying. Complete and utter silence befell them afterwards. text me when you're finished! When the screen lit up, a text message from Bokuto waited there for him. The last thing he wanted to do was wake him up, so they lay in silence for minutes on end. Not me llorando a la 1am por culpa de esto. this broke my heart into tiny little pieces, I really don't know if I will ever be able to recover. He turned his attention back to the only other in the room. what disease did, bokuto have in another lifeturkish airlines flight 981 victims. He looked around in weary haste, but calmed quickly once his memory had returned to him. I loved this. Surprised, Akaashi gave Bokuto his attention again. Another breath escaped him, slow and casual, but he'd soon learned to hold his breath when he noticed another person sitting outside in the hall, several feet from the room, where visitors could spend their time. "What's the big deal? It brought him back to his high school days. "Of course." DID is usually caused by past trauma. "You do? But on rare occasions, there were times when he'd have no choice but to watch Bokuto fall apart at the hands of his illness, and he hated it. They were still wrapped up in whatever conversation they were having. Alarmed, he snapped around quickly. Akaashi stared at Bokuto, opened his mouth to say something, but found that he couldn't form even one simple word. Bokuto would lay still for quite a while, his head tilted to the side with one hand on his stomach, and the other at his side. His head was down and his fingers moved swiftly over the buttons on the gaming device that he held in his hands. He lay his cheek on the top of Akaashi's head and kept still, daring not to wake him. "Bokuto is starting to look less and less like his old self, too. What was he to do? what disease did, bokuto have in another life. The stranger could have been a patient at the hospital for all Akaashi knew, and the last thing he needed was a sickly acquaintance to add to his already short list of friends. This book was absolutely fantabulous. Akaashi frowned and left his phone screen alone to dim and blacken. "Come." The sky was already black. He smiled in Akaashi's direction, bright yellow eyes catching his own. He pulled out a phone, and to Akaashi's dread, he asked for his phone number. He pushed his negative thoughts aside and sat himself down in bed, right next to Bokuto. "I see" Akaashi nodded once. Bokuto found himself smiling. Kuroo bid Bokuto farewell for the time being, while Kenma made his way downstairs to exit the building. Akaashi kicked his legs out of bed and strode to his window. He glared at them intensely with that same placid expression of his, making this look all the more unnerving. Akaashi woke with a start that same night, his strangled shouts having pulled him from his sleep. He talked about you all the time when he first met y-". ", "I'm" Kenma's lips puckered in thought. On occasion, one or two would land on him, and he would draw his hand in quickly to try and see if he could make out the small pattern on them. Akaashi sighed to himself, frustrated with how easily he'd given in to Bokuto's begging. Akaashi felt his palm- warm, full, caressing the round of his face. Akaashi would answer his questions coldly, with little to no emotion, but Bokuto would cherish these answers and retort with excitement in his tone. This time, Kuroo was the one to grunt, the sound coming from deep within his chest. "If you would please listen." He brought a hand up to push through his black hair, and slowly, his head fell forward. Bokuto knew this, and now Akaashi did, too. "I'm fine now.". Sleeping. The sound of someone cautiously moving their arm when they didn't wish to wake someone. "I understand. "Fucking bullshit." "Thank you." "Likewise.". He could feel his heartbeat thumping hard against his chest, as if it wanted to break free. Imagine their faces when they notice I'm not even in my room." His face looked both shocked and exhausted at the same time. He must have been. "Please hold onto it, Bokuto.". Or maybe January? "Do you still think that you are the best?" He pushed Akaashi back this time. They meet, and they cherish their memories until Bokuto dies. Same old, same old. Akaashi watched as the screen went to black, and it was then that he placed the phone back on his nightstand, choosing to ignore the message. Just as those words left Akaashi's mouth, the clouds outside parted, allowing the setting sun's orange light to flood into the room. "How does it feel? And with that glint came his smile. Akaashi stepped in and turned his head. He hung his head and tried to keep his crying controlled in the best way possible, but this proved to be very difficult as sobs broke out of him, causing his entire being to shake. Guessing quickly, Akaashi muttered, "One?". In a matter of minutes, just as Akaashi had started to fidget, Bokuto spoke up. He looked in Akaashi's direction. He looked around and moved his fingers, trying to make out a phone. Akaashi pressed play, and a video of Kuroo started to play. The light that came from outside reflected off of Bokuto's teardrops, lighting his face up in the most gentle of ways. Do something As if he were one of the living dead, Akaashi forced one leg forward, then the next, until he was touching the bed side. He was slow to speak up again, but did either way. He breathed in that familiar scent that he'd grown so attached to, then exhaled quietly against Bokuto's prominent collar bone. "You've had two panic attacks this week already, and your hallucinations are getting worse. Akaashi managed to say, staring out into the distance. With barely an ounce of strength left, Bokuto pulled himself up a tad to get a better look outside. Just then, as Akaashi bit down on the inside of his lower lip, he turned his head in time to catch a glimpse of Kenma lowering his head towards Bokuto. Akaashi squeezed his hands together to keep them from shaking uncontrollably. Akaashi's face buried into the crook of his neck. His lips brushed against his collarbone in desperate search of that familiar warmth. The ending is Akaashi dreaming, but Bokuto's soul/spirit is with Akaashi in his dream, and Bokuto "found him" In another life. Once again, that crippling spell took hold of him, and Akaashi couldn't move, nor could he speak. Akaashi tried to hide his frown. Bokuto tucked his hands into the pockets of his hood, his shoulders hunching. I'm taking you back." "It's just A slow, downhill ride f-from here. Akaashi's eyes lowered, focusing on the arm that was attached to the hand that he was holding. rockin' the west coast prayer group; easy bulky sweater knitting pattern. "Fine by me! And just like that, a smile found Bokuto's face again. Akaashi cast a weary look in Bokuto's direction, gave a nod, and continued on his way until he was out of the building. He would have to close Bokuto's blinds and take his mind off of it somehow. Work Search: Are you alright?". "They used to play volleyball together. Akaashi eyeballed the small male for a long second, knowing that he wouldn't look up to catch him. by postingAO3stories. He moved in his seat and sat straight against the head of the bed, then looked down at Bokuto. "Could you please toss to me some more?". He chuckled and rubbed at his face wearily. His hand trembled harder with each passing second, as if the movement would cause Bokuto to wake up. To the garden out in the back.". "Well, I'll be going now.". It's so good that I hate it so much because the sheer amount of pain it caused me. They were the only two in the gym. I hardly could read because of the tears in my eyes, everything was blurry. He held his hand up in a "peace sign", and the video ended with him on screen. He just breathed now. Akaashi inhaled deeply and closed his eyes, his eyebrows knitting together as his brow creased. On that one hand, three fingers stuck out. Do something Akaashi closed his mouth and swallowed. Sorry.]. I loved this. He threw the ball to Akaashi. Akaashi kept his eyes down. "I was drowning." Akaashi's chortling had been dragged out for a few seconds longer before he, too, quieted down. Shut him out, don't let him in. Because of the nightmare? Did you see that?!" Akaashi, don't give him a hard time, or you and I are going to fucking fight.". He blinked weakly and slid his fingers down the sides of his phone, a sign of weariness that he could not disobey. Akaashi frowned and felt that familiar pain pierce his chest. So he stayed in place, holding onto Bokuto, taking in his company for one last time before he'd never see him again. Though Bokuto's speaking skills weren't as good as they used to be, he was still the more talkative one out of the two. His face glowed the quietest shade of red, and he tried to hide it from Akaashi. "Get inside." The bright light caused him to squint as he read the message. I've watched this movie so many times, I actually fell asleep." Akaashi couldn't find any words to say at that moment. I recommended this book to my friend Sophia, and she cried too. Why?" For what felt like an eternity, Bokuto typed the words on Akaashi's phone. His eyelids drooping and then snapping open again, Bokuto made a small sound. "Yeah, I'm-," He turned his head, "Is there someone in there?" Akaashi was unhappy with where he was, unhappy with what it was that he was doing. Bokuto power walked ahead, obligating Akaashi to catch up to him with a quickened pace, whether he wanted to or not. [I must have texted you while you were asleep!]. He laughed again, louder this time. They had a strange relationship, to say the least. please dont make this flop i has to rearead EVERYTHING just so that i could be in the "feels" making this video. Thank you for stopping by, your interest means everything to me. Sleeping didn't come as easy as it used to. So much so that his hands trembled slightly whenever he'd push Akaashi's bangs away. ", "Yeah Yeah. right so, bokuto passes away while akaashi is in his hands, and basically at the end i'm pretty sure akaashi has a hallucination of bokuto where he says "I found you." The soft touch of Akaashi's hair against his chin comforted Bokuto, and pulled him into a relaxed state. "Well, you're laughing now" He tried to hide his smile. Akaashi sat at the edge of Kuroo's bed, and he stared out the window without focus. Kuroo started down the hall, Bokuto trailing after him. Bokuto looked back up and thought for a moment, then nodded. Bokuto shifted as he lay down, sticking a leg out to kick Akaashi. The ball was tossed back to him, and again, he got back to tossing the ball for Bokuto. This is strange. "What are you doing?". "I haven't set foot outside in weeks." Akaashi knew that running probably wasn't the best thing that he should have been doing, but he said nothing about it. more depressing than the outsiders. He held them against his frame in the twenty degree weather, and though many people gave him strange looks and watched him side-ways, none of this affected him in the slightest. Please consider turning it on! So please Let me have this.". Again, if he hadn't known any better, Akaashi would have figured that Bokuto was already fast asleep. He reached a hand out and took Bokuto's hand in his own. In time, Kuroo and Kenma found that it was time for them to make their way back home. He must have looked it up at some point, right? Akaashi closed his eyes and sighed, swaying absentmindedly in his step, opening his eyes just in time to swiftly avoid colliding with someone. That had been one of Bokuto's worst attacks yet. He turned his head in the opposite direction, facing Akaashi now. It still smelled like him. He pressed pause on his PSP and tapped one end of it against his open palm. ], [I know! "Get over here." ", "Well if you've watched it seven times then why not watch it an eighth time? Um" He scratched at his cheek, just below his eye. He pulled a mock cool expression, but this was cut short as someone else spoke up. His words were as straightforward as they were indifferent. "Relax." Pursing his lips, Akaashi let his head fall back into the pillows. It was cold. Taking the ball in his hands, Akaashi aimed for the approximate location as to where Bokuto would spike the ball. Despite this, Akaashi did not miss the look of slight nervousness that claimed Bokuto's features. Such an energetic texter, Bokuto was. By the time that movie ends, it'll be six. t had been some time since Akaashi set foot into that hospital. Out there, the sickly one trembled like a new born animal, even with the extra jacket that Akaashi had offered him. Akaashi stifled a laugh. He held onto the IV stand with one hand and Akaashi's hand with his other as he hobbled over to the window. "I'd dream that I messed up during a spike, and then I'd wake up fuming, and would constantly tell myself that I was the best.". But instead, he was greeted with nothing. "Thank you." Akaashi leaned back in his seat. Bokuto kept his finger up, then moved his hand to point it at himself. He forced himself to stand after some time, tapping his fingers against his pants. Stop asking already. to enjoy it, and okay, maybe you'll regret it when you're crying so hard you might pass out at 3am, but ultimately you'll be glad you read this masterpiece. He found he had nothing more to say. His yellow eyes stared at the screen intently. Looking down swiftly, Akaashi's sights locked onto his hands. He kept his weary yellow eyes on Akaashi, waiting for him to nod. Perplexed, Akaashi directed his full attention to Bokuto. He didn't wait for Kuroo to respond and glanced into Bokuto's room. He watched as Bokuto's chest rose and fell with each breath that kept him alive. "So How are you taking all of this, if I may ask? "I mean, in your state now, it's a bit clichd, don't you think?" His movements were uncoordinated and slow, and the only sounds he could manage were meek and most of the time inaudible. Keeping in contact with me wouldn't be a good idea.". Akaashi took a glance out the window, only to instantly throw on his clothes and toss his bag over his shoulders. To this, he shifted in closer and allowed his body to relax. Bokuto's words haunted him, and they repeated themselves over and over in his mind. He focused on nothing Something he remembered Kenma doing. Once Bokuto noticed this, he turned his head and slowly rolled away. He translated all that his words could not. Long time.". Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. "I spoke to Kuroo most of the time, so it doesn't count.". It had been three days since Bokuto's passing, and surely enough, sleep did not come to Akaashi as easily as it used to. He suffered no nightmares, nor did he see anything remotely close to a dream. Akaashi figured it was safe to say that Bokuto had already begun to pull Kenma back in. "It's your house. He was grinning. He wanted to rid himself of this feeling, rid himself of this silence, so he searched his mind in haste for any word that came to mind. Weakly, Akaashi parted his lips. That's how much he supposedly weighs now? He left the room quickly, leaving Bokuto by his lonesome. He pulled himself closer to Bokuto, and nudged his face into the warmth of his neck. One of the voices belonged to Bokuto. "I don't want you to grow any m-more attached to me th-than y-you already are. But as he thought of it, he figured he couldn't be blamed for it. ", "It passed." He was extremely pale, and somehow thinner than before, but he kept that same smile on his face. I was the only one willing to give it to him." He could still remember the small details, like how Bokuto's starry shirt would slip off his shoulder every so often when he stirred in bed, and how the feel of Bokuto's weight on him would take his breath away.